Christine Stewart’s missing sock dilemma (C8) is a well-worn subject here. In fact, Andrew Brown of Bowling Alley Point recalls “one Column 8 wit opining that at the far end of the universe, there is a race of one-legged beings wondering how a sock could pair up in the washing machine?”
The wit in question was writer and communications authority Debra Mayrhofer, who suggested that: “As the machine washes, it agitates the clothes in a circular fashion, building up to a frenzy as the spin cycle commences. This cyclonic action creates a vortex, which, given the right atmospheric and electromagnetic conditions, results in a window into the fourth dimension. Due to nature’s love of symmetry, the bonding of the sock pairs is broken, and one from each couple is sent hurtling through space and time into an alternative universe. A tumble dryer can sometimes be used to reverse this effect, although there is no guarantee that the sock you retrieve will be your own.”
“To put travelling costs into perspective, I offer this,” says Richard Moore of Coffs Harbour. “In 1947, according to the NSW Railway country timetable, it cost 10 pounds, 18 shillings and 6 pence for a return first class sleeper cabin to Melbourne, until Albury anyway and then onto the Spirit of Progress. Using the inflation calendar, that translates to $881.20. So, we think $200 airfares are high? 90 minutes instead of 15 hours? Discuss.”
David “Two Blues” Pigott of North Parramatta thinks, “It was so appropriate for the article on the demise of the TG Millner Field to be placed next to the Death Notices.”
The Death of a Salesman (C8) sagas are still kicking, with Richard Blair of Randwick recalling another Warren Mitchell incident that happened at a separate performance: “It was 1982 at the Seymour Centre. A guy in the audience had an extended coughing fit and Willy Loman (Mitchell), said to his son Biff (Mel Gibson) as he left the stage, ‘While you’re out, call into the chemist and buy a packet of lozenges for this fellow in the audience!’ It brought the house down, even though it’s a serious drama.”
Although Adrian Bell (C8) said he wouldn’t seek it, Don Bain of Port Macquarie is up for a duel, “provided I get my choice of weapons. Cream puffs at twenty paces.” Les Shearman of Darlington suggests they go at it “Mano a Manojlovic”.
Column8@smh.com.au
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